Have I Learned Anything?

I just read my friend's blog and she commented on the fact that she is 8 years into parenting and still knows next to nothing! Well I'm 5 years in and I feel the same way. Everyday is challenging. Everyday I screw up. But, like my friend Carrie said, "everyday is a new day for me to exercise my faith." Praise God that his mercies are new every morning. Have I mentioned that parenting is the hardest thing I've ever done? Sometimes I feel totally inadequate. Bewildered. Helpless. Even hopeless. Will it ever change? Will my child grow up to be a responsible, caring, loving, generous adult, or will she always be the way she is now? It is so hard to watch the rebellion in your child's heart manifest itself. And then when I regain my self-control and breath a deep breath, I go in and talk to her about the sin in her heart, and she says, "you have sin in your heart too." And what do I say to that? Yes, I do. Lots of it. And it sucks. I just pray that all this talking and disciplining and instructing and training will one day make a difference. I have to believe that it will. One day.

School is about to start. One more week of summer left. On one hand, I am excited about it. Princess is definitely excited, and I am looking forward to my time one-on-one with Pumpkin and my time alone when Pumpkin is at mother's day out. But, on the other hand, I have some concerns. I am not worried about how she will do. I know she will do just fine, probably better than fine. I'm not worried about her making friends or sitting still (although I've never actually seen her sit still). I'm worried about the fact that we still have so much to work on in the way of obedience and respect. For the next 8 months, the only time I will have with her to "train her in the way she should go" will be in the morning when we are rushing around to get ready for school and in the evening when she is mentally exhausted from school and on the weekends. There is one argument for home school. But, that is not what we have chosen for her, so I will do the best with the time I have with her. I just hope that Drummer Boy and I can find a balance between holding her to the standard of obedience and respectfulness that we believe is right and giving her grace as she adjusts to a long day of school. As always, any advice or encouragement from friends is appreciated.